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Space, it’s Big n Stuff

Well, given how big space is, it’s actually surprising that we don’t have more news stories

This Space Ship Hitting a Snag was submitted to us by Dave*

This Space Ship Hitting a Snag was submitted to us by Dave*

regarding it.  Still, fear not, Nibblers, today we have three!  Rather than the tradition “Niblbet” format, we have decided to put it all in one exciting post.  If you like it maybe we could add a science section, if it isn’t too thinky for us.

So, if you read certain annoying rags, (which will remain nameless here as we have been using a cattle prod to make the interns associate the name with pain, and not use it) you will know that India had a plan to send a rocket to Mars.  If you are a reader of aforementioned nameless rag you will probably have tutted and said something about how the expense could have been used elsewhere.  If you then went shopping in self righteous little way to buy yourself so cheap clothes in an unethical cheap clothes shop, please stop reading, go else where, we are not the website for you, you won’t like us.  What those of you who are still reading might already know, if we are not your only source of news and information, is that the according to the BBC Science and yEnvironment Section the mission to Mars was “hit by a snag”.

The report itself used lots of sciencey words, and acronyms that are way too confusing for us, but the gist is  that “A problem with the liquid fuel thruster caused the 1,350kg vehicle to fall short of the mark”, which is disappointing in any situation.

We asked our fans if they did any sewings or similar, so that we could offer up some tips on how to deal with future snags.  They told us:

Absolutely nothing. Clearly they know nothing about space, or sewing.

So we hoped that would be helpful, but clearly it wasn’t.

Our next space related story brings a whole new meaning to the phrase vacuum packed. There is currently a random tomato orbiting earth.  That’s right, folks, a random tomato.  According to sploid.gismo.com the astronauts on the international space station enjoy a tomato salad (we are paraphrasing, as all the best news reporting organisations do) and a random tomato must have escaped somehow.  Once again, we are not experts, but we were always under the impression that windows that open on a space station were probably not the best idea, so how did the tomato escape?  We wonder whether the whole “enjoying tomatoes” thing is a ruse to cover up an imminent threat of invasion, if aliens were tomatoes, which they aren’t.  Also, we wonder whether governments would have a contingency plan in place if tomatoes were to invade the Earth, as the article suggests.  Freedom of information would make this information available to us if we could be bothered to look for it, which we can’t.

And finally, here is a video about space, which is nice.

 

*See more by Dave by clicking here



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Misconduct is Something to Shout About!

The Misconducters released their debut album in December of 2010. Angrier than an angry beaver on PCP, It’s All Yours includes re-recorded versions of the four songs on misconducters_featuretheir 2008 EP You’re Asking for It… which, to be fair, I was.
Although front man Den has remained a constant on guitar and lead vocals, the rest of the band’s line up has changed since the EP release, and the addition of Cai on drums and backing vocals gives the new album a much more polished finish than the more rustic EP.
Having completed the medium level of Guitar Hero, Rockonnection felt that I was amply qualified to review this latest offering from the Misconducters, and, since I share the angry world hating view that the album imparts, I was forced to agree.
The new release from the Misconducters combines Punk Rock with Metal and Hard Rock in an eclectic mix that defies genre. This is perhaps not surprising, when we consider the many different influences, including blues artists like Elmore James and Steve Ray Vaughan. Den tells me that he takes inspiration from everything from The Beatles to Napalm Death, describing the sound as “organic” and suggesting that it is a living entity, constantly changing and developing, which is true. He doesn’t like labels and says that
“uniforms are for the narrow-minded”, which I think should be printed on a t-shirt and given to all his fans to wear with pride. When asked to define the Misconducters’ style, he told me, “Never mind the style, I play what I like to listen to”; a doctrine that should form the basis of all music.
The Misconducters’ sound is both distinctive and unique. Cai has a background listening to jazz, and only took an interest in metal music two years ago, when he started playing the drums. According to Den, “He was hitting the drums so slowly and softly on his audition, I thought for a second we could just turn into a pop band for a change.” Luckily for us, he found his angry side in time for the release of the album. I, for one, would not be impressed if the Misconducters were playing Blue Peter.
It’s All Yours sees Den taking on lead vocals, guitar and bass, as the band has gone
through a number of bass players who could not offer the level of commitment he
expected to take his band to the next level. “Right now, I’m more demanding than
ever in looking out for the band’s future” he tells me. “As a group we need someone
who wants to move the band forward, not just turn up, have a laugh and make some
noise”. Whilst Den’s skill as a musician is undeniable, and the album certainly loses
nothing from his multi-tasking, the band is nonetheless on the lookout for a new
bassist in order for them to start gigging again. There was talk for a while of some
experimental surgery to give him an extra pair of arms, but the risks outweighed the
benefits, and buying shirts would have been a nightmare.
I can’t talk about It’s All Yours without taking some time to talk about the lyrics.
Despite the fact that your granny would sit through the entire album saying, “What’s
he saying? I can’t understand, he’s just shouting. Why is it so loud?” the lyrics are
actually an important part of what the band stands for. They shout against mediocrity
and apathy in society. ‘Sick of Hearing Shit’ takes what society accepts as daily
norms, and illustrates how meaningless it is. The new video for ‘Bad Slave’
incorporated images of war and anarchy to show people rebelling against society, and
its conventions.

“I want my songs to make people think,” Den explains, “not just grab
a beer and pogo or headbang”.

Whether you agree with the attitudes or not, the Misconducters defy convention, and have to be respected.

Whatever your taste in rock music, be it Punk, Hard Rock or Metal, there is bound to
be something for you on It’s All Yours. I can’t wait for it to be released on Guitar Hero,
so I can kick its ass on medium. Until then, I’m off to annoy the neighbours with loud
angry music.

First published on Rockonnection.com

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Have Ewe Seen My Sheep?

Well, a recent spate of sheep thefts in Cumbria and Teesdale,  combined with this news report has inspired us to create this, nibblet, satirical cartoon and quiz all in one fantastic post!  Don’t say we don’t spoil you!  So, as a result of, what one can only assume (or read the actual report if you can be bothered) is the recover of aforementioned stolen sheep, farmers have been invited to identify their misappropriated flock at what we are going to call, Sheepgate, just cos we can.

 

sheepquizSo, Badger did this doodle as her interpretation of how she thinks Sheepgate will go.  The quiz is, can you tell us the odd one out?  There is NO prize, it’s just fun.  Comment below with which is the odd one out and why, and we will announce the correct answer on the Facebook page.  We do spoil you.

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A Prayer for Pussy Riot

If you’ve been living in a box for the past several months you may not have
noticed what’s been going on with Russian Punk Rock band Pussy Riot. The
band, best known for their impromptu performances in unusual places such as
on top of a bus, or in the street, have had three of their members imprisoned for
two years on charges of hooliganism motivated by religious hatred.
The charge is a result of a performance in a Russian Orthodox Cathedral, where
the band, wearing brightly coloured balaclavas, sang a song called “Punk Prayer:
Mother of God, Chase Putin Away!”


The performance did not appear to cause any damage to the church, and the two year sentence has been criticised by the majority of the World’s media, who have described it as “disproportionate”. The band is best known for their feminist and gay rights stance, which goes against current ideologies within their country. Whilst, prior to their arrest and sentencing, few people outside of Russia would have heard of Pussy Riot and what they’re about, the result of this sentence seems to have galvanised the European community into action. In an open letter to the band, actor and comedian Stephen Fry described the sentence as “astoundingly unfair and disproportionate” and a petition launched on the Avaaz site already has over 571,000 signatures, and this is growing daily. According to the petition site, upon sentencing, a member of the band said:

“Despite the fact that we are physically here, we are freer than everyone sitting across from us … We can say anything we want…”.

And that is perhaps the crux of this whole thing, freedom of speech. That is something that in this country we take for granted. We are allowed to have and voice our opinions without fear of reprisals and it is for this reason that I have waved my usual Curly Wurly and taken this opportunity to exercise my freedom of speech to inform you of these events. Whether you agree with someone’s viewpoint or not, you need to support their right to an opinion. What Pussy Riot has done is extraordinarily brave. They have stood up and spoken, knowing full well the consequences of their actions and they have drawn the World’s attention to their plight. Amnesty International has a page on their site dedicated to sending messages of support to the band members, who have been in prison since their arrest in March. The online shop BackstreetMerch.com has launched a range of “Free Pussy Riot” t-shirts and bags, with profits going to support their legal fund. It is, perhaps, surprising that a simple performance in a church would illicit this much of an international reaction, and I can’t help but wonder if anyone would have noticed if Pussy Riot had simply been given a warning and told not to do it again. Reactions to the antics in the church have been mixed. Some people have called it distasteful and even blasphemous, but in a closing statement, Yekaterina Samutsevich – one of the convicted band members – informed the court that this was not their intention.

“That Christ the Savior Cathedral had become a significant symbol in the political strategy of the authorities was clear to many thinking people when Vladimir Putin’s former [KGB] colleague Kirill Gundyayev took over as leader of the Russian Orthodox Church. After this happened, Christ the Savior Cathedral began to be openly used as a flashy backdrop for the politics of the security forces, which are the main source of political power in Russia”.

It is, perhaps, for this reason that Amnesty has deemed them “prisoners of conscience”.


The band have gained support from celebrities all over the world; Madonna wore the band’s name on her back at a gig in Moscow, praised their courage and said that she prayed for their freedom.
Most recently Russian Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev has said in a televised interview that “a suspended sentence, taking into account the time they have already spent, would be entirely sufficient”. Whilst this by no means secures the band’s release it does show how public opinion is affecting the situation.

Can music change the world? Well, maybe.

You can read all three members’ closing statements here.
Read more about the comments by Dmitry Medvedev here.

You can read Stephen Fry’s open letter to the band here.

See Madonna’s comments here.

Feature originally published on Rockonnection.com

Watch the performance that started it all below.

 

 

*Important update:Please follow this link and read the update from Amnesty International. Remember, we have a voice and can use it

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Nibblets

Cracking Auction Gromit!

Well, if you’ve been following our epic Gromit hunt over the summer then you may be interested to know what’s  happened to those colourful canines since they have been removed from the streets of Bristol.  Well, they were all auctioned off in aid of The Grand Appeal.  And no, we couldn’t afford one. Starting at £20,000, the climax of the evening was Buzz Light Gromit, selling for a cracking £65,000!  That could buy a lot of cheese! Anyway, if you missed the action and would like to see the auction you can by clicking here.

 

Sex: It’s a killer.

As you know, here at Newsnibbles we take any opportunity to cover a story that we can even tenuously relate to sex.  We wouldn’t need to do this if you people weren’t quite so obsessed. You should see the top search terms that find us (thank you Slim Stat).  So, a study published in PNAS has revealed that some marsupials, (the ones who live down under – it’ll get worse before it gets better) mate with such vigour that it quite literally kills them!  Dubbed in the abstract (or foreplay, if you will) “Suicidal Reproduction”, the study also informs us that marsupials suffering from this affliction go at it for 14 hours before giving up the ghost.  The climax to this massive sex marathon, the likes of which has only ever been seen in badly written erotica which we would never read is the creature’s untimely demise.  Well, at least they went out with a bang, as it were…

 

Forget the Honey…

It’s Beet Soup all the way for Russian bears!  A couple in Serbia were forced to hide out in their bath house and await the police when a bear, attracted by the smell of their cooling soup broke in and devoured it!  The impression we get from the BBC Report is that the most disturbing thing about the whole encounter was that the bear choose to eat the soup whilst it was still hot, rather than waiting for it to cool, which would have been the civilised thing to do.  You can’t really blame the bear, however.  This is learnt behaviour based on the whole Goldielocks/porridge incident.  That is all.


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Nibblets

Is That a Nose on Your Forehead?

Why yes, yes it is.  Doctors in China have come up with an innovative solution for a man who lost his nose due to infection after a car accident.  Far from recommending the Jacko solution of a cunningly placed face mask, which would in most circumstances make one look both mysterious, and a bit serialkillerish, those clever Chinese MDs have decided to grow him a new nose on his forehead.   According to the article we read the reason for the prominently placed proboscis is that the skin or dermis (and we don’t even have a science correspondent) on the forehead is closer to the type of skin on the nose, so it will be easier to transfer.  It has taken nine months to grow this additional hooter on his head, and it looks pretty darn cool.  We can’t help but wonder if, when this post goes viral, which we’re sure it will, lots of rich people will be having additional schnozzle grown in various places about their person, as a fashion statement.  We predict that it’ll be as popular as tattoos soon.  You heard it here first folks.

If you are more interested in the science than our sarky comments then you can read Headlines & Global News’ more sciency report.

 

We Are Not Alone!

Now, we aren’t saying you need to build an alien shelter in the back garden yet, or move onto a boat and live in the middle of the ocean. We aren’t sure either of those things would help anyway.  In 1996 Scientists pointed the Hubble telescope at what seemed to be a black hole (ooer missus) and now, almost twenty years later (and we thought we were slow to report on stuff) it has revealed over over three thousand galaxies!  Both fascinating and excitings!

You can watch a really interesting video about it by clicking here.

 

The 80s Are Making a Come Back!

Well, not really.  But just in case you thought these Nibblets were a bit too grown up and sciency, fear not.  We are back to our usual style with this one.  Two brothers have made a fantastic 80s style music video to beg their brother not to leave them and get married. “We Are Brothers” By Baddy Paris and Rufus Starlight may actually be the BEST best man speech EVA!  If you chaps are readers of Newsnibbles (and why wouldn’t you be?) we would love to do an interview, so get in touch.  And of course, Nibblers, we have embedded the video below for your viewing pleasure.


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Final Gromit in Sophie’s Hunt

Try not to be sad, Nibblers, Sophie’s hunt might be over but fear not, we are bound to come up with something equally exciting for our next mission! And don’t forget, you still have time to get some Gromit Spotting in before September 8th. Find out more at The Gromit Unleashed Website.

17. Groscar – Thunderbolt Square.  “Well folks we have come to the end of our travels.  I would like to say thank-you to my mum for providing the leg power behind this hunt, my cousins for supporting and advising me along the way, to Aardman for coming up with these grand days out, to Newsnibbles for sponsoring me (although I’m still waiting for the money) and finally all my followers that have endured the ups and downs, the greens and the blues. Until next time this is Sophie saying goodbye Gromit.”

Groscar by Chris Taylor

Groscar by Chris Taylor

 

“I told you if Grant can have a Gromit so can I.  Here is my version of a Gromit I have seen on my travels, there is a zero cash prize from Newsnibbles if you can correctly identify.” – as with all our quizzes, the prize is the joy of seeing your photo published on our prestigious website. We are predicting zero entries anyway, so not to worry.

sophiesgromitAnd there is now a concern that Sophie has been spending too much time around Gromits…

 

sophiegromit


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Sophie’s Gromit Hunt

This is our penultimate Gromit Hunt post.  But fear not, Nibblers, we will come up with something equally good for our next travel segment.  And remember, you can find out more about the trail and do it yourself at the The Gromit Unleashed Website.

40. Blazing Saddles – Double Tree By Hilton.   “Let’s go round up some sheeps.” – Or not…

Blazing Saddles by Carys Ink

Blazing Saddles by Carys Ink

 

21. What a Wind up! Redcliffe Street.   “This Gromit was a little simple in design but blue is a good colour and i feel I add some colour with my pink ensemble.”

What a Wind Up! by Trevor Baylis OBE

What a Wind Up! by Trevor Baylis OBE

 

41. Bunty – St Mary Redcliffe.   “No party is complete without a little bunting, it just screams summer, I love it.”

Bunty by Paula Bowles

Bunty by Paula Bowles

 


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Sophie’s Gromit Hunt

More Gromits to start your Monday. Start your day the right way, with a dose of Newsnibbles and Gromit! And remember, you can find out more about the trail and do it yourself at the The Gromit Unleashed Website.

 

31. Lancelot – Quakers Friars.   “I wonder if Arthur and a sword are around here somewhere.”

Lancelot by Sir Paul Smith

Lancelot by Sir Paul Smith

 

32. Grosmos – Harvey Nichols   “This one is far out, so far it’s in a galaxy far away.”

Grosmos by Cheba

Grosmos by Cheba

 

35. Gnashional Gromit – Bristol Marriot Hotel City Centre.   “Now, there have been some fancy Gromits and been some funny Gromits, but this Gromit has Beano one of the greats.”

 

Gnashional Gromit by The Beano

Gnashional Gromit by The Beano

 


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Sophie’s Gromit Hunt

Here’s some sunny Sunday Gromits for you! We’re nearly at the end of our hunt, but fear not, Nibblers, we will find something equally exciting for our Travel Correspondent to take up for our new popular travel section.  And remember, you can find out more about the trail and do it yourself at the The Gromit Unleashed Website.

 

45. Being Gromit Malkovich – Brunel’s ss Great Britain.  ” isn’t there a film by this name?  I wonder if that was the inspiration behind this Gromit?”

Being Gromit Malovich by Thomas Dowdeswell

Being Gromit Malovich by Thomas Dowdeswell

 

36. A Grand Day Out – Enterprise Zone.  “Grand days out are certainly what I have been having. So thank you Gromits.”

A Grand Day Out by Andy O'Rourke

A Grand Day Out by Andy O’Rourke

 

37. May Contain Nuts (& Bolts) – Bristol Temple Meads.  “Careful with this one could cause a reaction, an OMG reaction.” – These kids and their text speak.

May Contain Nuts (& Bolts) by Natalie Guy

May Contain Nuts (& Bolts) by Natalie Guy

 

38. Isambark Kingdog Brunel – Bristol Temple Meads.   “Now this guy looks familiar. Isn’t he some famous bridge guy?  I do believe I have already shown you this brigde with a previous Gromit.” – Can you remember which Gromit is in front of the bridge, Nibblers? Pop a comment below why don’t you? You never know, Sophie might reply.

Isambark Kingdog Brunel by Tim Miness

Isambark Kingdog Brunel by Tim Miness

 


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