The Poo That Broke The Internet

Last week, a woman on a Tinder date in Bristol hit the headlines for an unusual reason.  She became stuck, upside-down in a bathroom window after climbing in to try and fish out a lump of poo.

The self proclaimed “Shirehampton Sh*t Slinger” had been on a date to the most romantic of retreats, Nandos, and had returned to the House on Poo Corner, as the interns have dubbed it, to finish the romantic evening with a bottle of wine and a documentary on Scientology. What could be better?  Perhaps she ordered too much side salad, perhaps there was too much caffeine in the after dinner coffee, perhaps wine just gets her that way, the truth is, we may never know the true cause of the incident, but, at some point during the evening, the woman in question had to excuse herself to the bathroom.

Under any other circumstances, the egg she laid would have impressive. We are clearly talking Guinness World Record sized turd, because try as she might, it would not flush away.  Rather than getting a bucket of water, or covering the offending article with tissue, poo panic set in, and poo panic logic dictated that the best course of action would be too fish said faeces out of the bowl, and fling it out of the window… one can only presume with the hope of blaming a passing horse…  Unfortunately, the plan went awry went the sash window turned out to have a second pane of glass behind the first, trapping the offending turd in the gap.  Not to be defeated by mere glass, our intrepid hero then climbs up and reaches in to retrieve the offending specimen, only to get stuck, see picture below…

    The fire brigade had to be called to retrieve her.  The adventure has a happy ending, however, as according to The Metro, not only are the couple going to see each other again, but the window has been fixed for free, and the money raised through crowd funding originally designated to fix the window is going to charity.

Here at Newsnibbles, we would like to add our own special thanks to the couple, for giving us something to write about, we feel we are truly back doing what we do best.

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