Well, yesterday was the Wimbledon final in what has been a very exciting tournament. If you missed it, fear not, Badger’s
blow by blow account which was posted on Twitter during the live event is below for your viewing pleasure. Once again this is in no way an attempt to avoid sourcing an actual news story. During the commentary we received a lot of questions as to whether Badger is in fact a tennis expert. Badger knows about as much about tennis as she knows about any other sport, which is frankly, not a lot. Having said that, they seemed to go down well, and if you think Badger should have a wider reach for her commentaries why not join the Twitter campaign to #makebadgerabbccommentator ?
- Would anyone like me to do a #Wimbledon commentary?
- Well they’re hitting the ball back and forth… Roger just missed it… #Wimbledon
- Still hitting the ball back and forth, Andy just missed so they’re even… #Wimbledon
- Where are the Wombles? #Wimbledon
- Some man from the crowd just screamed “I love you Roger” nice he can be so open about his emotions… #Wimbledon
- Andy’s bat is red, which matches the stripes on his t-shirt, which is nice… #Wimbledon
- Roger has a bandage on his head, hope it’s not serious… #Wimbledon
- Wow, this commentator really loves 15. Each to their own… #Wimbledon
- Some girl in a skirt just ran across the net and took a ball, is that allowed? #Wimbledon
- If they didn’t hit it so hard at each other it would be easier to play… #Wimbledon
- If that boy kneeling at the side is waiting to cross he would probably be safer going round the edge… #Wimbledon
- Doh! Net! Now everyone’s clapping and their taking a break, I see a banana in their futures… #Wimbledon
- That was a loopy one. Wow, this guy really loves 15. #Wimbledon
- Oh now come on, how was he supposed to hit that back? #Wimbledon
- Who is that man who keeps grunting? It’s quite off-putting. #Wimbledon
- If they bounced it and knocked it gently over they wouldn’t keep hitting the net like this… #Wimbledon
- Sir Cliff is wearing a very interesting jacket. Fingers crossed it doesn’t rain so he won’t burst into song. #Wimbledon
- The boy waiting at the edge of the net is gunna be late for dinner if he doesn’t get home soon… #Wimbledon
- Who wears short shorts? That random towel person wears short shorts… #Wimbledon
- Why is the yacht club lined up along the back wall? #Wimbledon
- They should really stop being so negative, he’s never going to feel good about himself if they keep finding fault with his serve. #Wimbledon
- Stop aiming for the net! That boy just made a break for is and ran across the net, maybe he’ll get home for dinner. #Wimbledon
- They are having a squash break. Barely water? #Wimbledon
- That court could use some Miracle Gro, it’s very patchy… #Wimbledon
- Murray won that game, I was so busy looking at the grass I missed it. #Wimbledon
- I’d like to share his Toblerone if he doesn’t mind me near his cow… #Wimbledon (NB This is a reference to Federer being presented with a cow the first year he won Wimbledon by his country, and badgers allegedly spreading Bovine TB. They say if you have to explain it then it isn’t funny, but we are hoping that you will chuckle anyway).
- What a splendid brolly! It only seems to be raining over Murray, is he like Eeyore? #Wimbledon
- The commentator just told Boris not to look at him, is he ashamed? #Wimbledon
- Apparently their balls are sliding all over the place. Is there a doctor anywhere? #Wimbledon
- Are those boys playing quick cricket across the net? #Wimbledon
- Oh GOD! There should be a rule about putting Cameron on TV without prior notice! I spilt my tea everywhere! #Wimbledon
- What did I just say BBC??? A shot of Boris and Dave together is too much for a badger to bear! #Wimbledon
- Are the having some juice? #Wimbledon
- What’s the deal with all the Top Gun Sunglasses, are they back in style and I missed it?#Wimbledon
- He wears short shorts. I don’t mind. #Wimbledon
- Why does that man keep shouting incomprehensibly? It’ll only put them off. #Wimbledon
- Roger has lovely hair. #Wimbledon
- Who says men can’t multi-task? Shot of Dave clapping and masticating at the same time. The country is in good hands. #Wimbledon
- Would this process be more entertaining on a unicycle? #Wimbledon
- The shot of Murray in slow motion made me think of Aleksandr Orlov (Founder of Compare the Meerkat), I don’t know why… #Wimbledon
- Who was that woman with the bellowing voice? This random shouting is very disturbing! #Wimbledon
- According to the commentator Murray is eating up the balls, did he not have cornflakes before he came? #Wimbledon
- Ooo, the quick cricket is going on again. Surely they could play that when the tennis is over… #Wimbledon
- Wonder how much they get paid to run around with towels, or is it just an honour? #Wimbledon
- Shouldn’t Andrew Castle be holding a bunch of flowers and advertising injury law instead of pontificating in the commentary box? #Wimbledon
- I think to save me getting Tweet barred you can assumed they are hitting the ball back and forth unless otherwise stated. #Wimbledon
- Really Andrew? You know what’s on his mind now do you? Maybe instead of Injury law you could advertise Street Psychics! #Wimbledon
- Did Boris just call Andrew “love”? I don’t understand this whacky tennis talk… #Wimbledon
- Is it Pimms O’Clock yet? #Wimbledon
- Really? Federer should be doing a rain dance? Is Andrew Castle in any position to be talking about dancing?! #Wimbledon
- Those ball boys seemed a bit confused, good job they didn’t crash, that could have been embarrassing. #Wimbledon
- Is he paid by the word? Let’s start #makebadgerabbccommentator trend. They’ll have to listen to that!
- Does the grunting help? Badgers rarely grunt… That bit was exciting apparently… #Wimbledon
- They could even have a switch commentary option, so people could choose to badger or not to badger. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- They’re bringing out the roof. Cliff is itching to crack out his guitar… #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Why is Andrew so fussed about the rain? The can just have someone with a stripy brolly follow them about the court. #Wimbledon
- I wish he’d stop pretending to be psychic, it’s irritating. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- So, from that 5 minute commentary I have grasped that it’s a draw! Let Boris talk, PLEASE! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Now that bloke seems to love thirty. Fifteen will be so hurt. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Play is suspended because of the rain… braces for singing… #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Armed forces are patrolling the locker room? That not a bit extreme, I doubt they’ll run away… #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Oh phew, we’re back to Sue, hi Sue. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- He’s still talking! Shush Andrew, it’s Sue’s turn to talk. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- OMG, they’re closing the roof! All is lost! No-one panic, repeat, no-one panic! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- I’m not commentating on the repeat. They could be showing a cartoon instead! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Oh, we’re back, and we’re interviewing Steve Redgrave, because tennis is just like rowing… #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Ooo, Murray just fell over, is @AndrewCastle80 gunna run on with an Injury law business card? #Wimbledon
- Apparently something good just happened… *claps* #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Half volley? Couldn’t he manage a whole one? #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- I’ve been tweeted by you since I don’t know when… #randomabbatweet
- He fell over again! Business opportunity for @AndrewCastle80 – grab your flowers and run, man! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Ooo, Andy has cracked out an energy bar, what happened to a good old fashioned banana? #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Why do they keep calling it “indoors” just cos they’ve put the roof across? It’s indoors like camping is indoors! #Wimbledon
- I’m quite good at tennis on the WII. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- The problem with wearing whites that I can see is the potential grass stains. Bet their mothers dread #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Well, @AndrewCastle80 is discussing the medals of his co-commentators, shame they can’t get a word in! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Seriously though, #makebadgerabbccommentator – #Wimbledon
- Apparently I’m not being vague enough… how about. The grass is green, but the roof is raining. #makebadgerabbccommentator#Wimbledon
- Now we’re talking about his ball striking ability. Perhaps my flaw is a lack of technical terminology? #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Good ball hitting back and forth there chaps. Nice. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- @AndrewCastle80 How do you feel about supporting my bid to #makebadgerabbccommentator ? I think it would be stronger with you on team…
- If they took the net away they wouldn’t keep hitting it all the time… #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Wow he bashed that ball fo sho! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Say “indoors” one more time Castle! I dare you!!! It’s not bloody indoors!!! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Why to people keep grunting, does it help? #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Oh, they’re having Juice again, and just when it’s a draw… #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- I can’t help but feel that I’m the only one committed to this #makebadgerabbccommentator thing. Come on people…
- Another gem from Andrew Castle, it’s the last stand apparently… Not exactly the Alamo is it?! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Also, aren’t commentators supposed to be neutral? This is why we should #makebadgerabbccommentator – I just don’t care…
- Well done Roger. Good work. Never mind Andy, next year. #makebadgerabbccommentator#Wimbledon
- Is there a difference between British and Scottish, Andrew Castle? Either think before you speak, or stop talking! #makebadgerabbccommentator
- Oh no! Murray’s crying, and everyone’s clapping! Leave the poor chap alone! #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- Awww, don’tcha just wanna give him a cuddle? #Wimbledon
- Perhaps Andy Murray could be a BBC commentator? #Wimbledon
- Murray got all the way to the final! They should applaud that and stop being so negative. #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
- I’d be OK with £575K… just if anyone is interested… #Wimbledon#makebadgerabbccommentator
